The Wednesday Howl (Doggie Pledge)

  • I will not eat the cat’s food, before or after they eat it.

  • “Kitty box crunchies” are not food.

  • The computer’s mouse is, unlike a real mouse, inedible.

  • I will not eat the disposable diapers, especially the dirty ones.

  • I will not play tug o’ war with Dad’s underwear when he’s on the toilet.

  • I will not eat any more socks and then re-deposit them in the backyard after processing.

  • I will not chew my human’s toothbrush and not tell them.

  • I will not chew crayons or pens, especially the red ones, so my people will think I am dying.

  • I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc.

  • I will not wake Mommy up by sticking my cold, wet nose in her ear.

  • I will not burn rubber through the open car window and into the fast food restaurant, no matter how good it smells.

  • I will not throw up in the car.

  • I will not bite the officer’s hand when he reaches in for mom’s driver’s license and car registration.

  • When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down when it’s raining outside.

  • I must shake the rainwater out of my fur “before” entering the house.

  • I will not drop soggy tennis balls in the underwear of someone who is sitting on the toilet.

  • I will not steal my Mom’s underwear and dance all over the back yard with it.

  • The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are Mom and Dad’s laps.

  • We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on TV.

  • Ditto for door knocking

  • I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I’m lying under the coffee table.

  • My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

  • Ditto for our guest’s crotch.

  • I will not roll my toys behind the fridge.

  • The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff.


34 Responses

  1. hello rusty its dennis the vizsla dog hay this is a gud list eksept kitty boks kruncheez ar in fakt fud i saw dada eeting them wunse!!! wel he klayms he wuz eeting dried shoogard tamarind but i no better ha ha ok bye

  2. The ideas on this list are really rockin’ my world! This is deep stuff, man.

  3. Great list Rusty!!!
    you’re great!!!!
    thankas for sharing with us all these secrets!!!
    we love you!!!!!!
    kisses and licks!!!

  4. BOL!!!

    WOW that was awonderful list!

    Soooo many things to remember to do…

    Lots of Luv & Kisses
    Addie and Lucie

  5. Now if you stop doing all these things what fun is life anymore? I think a lot of them are still valid and you should be able to do them. Like taking your moms underwear outside…..what was it doing where you could get it in the first place….seriously. =)

  6. That was great, Rusty, especially the one about the wet tennis balls and underwear and the toilet:-) Is it OK to chew the toothbrush if woo DO tell Mommy about it?

    Tail wags, the OP Pack

  7. BOL! You play tug-o-war with your dad’s underwear while he’s doing his errm business? Hahaha!!

    Butt sniffs,
    Solid Gold Dancer

  8. BOL- I think that list is pretty long… I dunno if I can remember all of them!


  9. Hmm.. why did that officer have to pull your mom over? BOL
    And I’ve puked in the car too.. but only because I wasn’t feeling good. Mom was thankful I aimed right for a little dish in the car. Clean up was easy!

  10. I think I khan manage most of ’em!


  11. Hi, Rusty!
    Those are lots of NO’s!
    Kisses and hugs

  12. BOL!!! However, I beg your pardon but I think my head does belong in the refrigerator! 😉


  13. Now THAT is funny!

    Lots of Licks, Ruby

  14. Rusty, you are wonderful to explain this pledge to us humans. I tried to get Penny to sign, but (1) she can’t write, and (2), she refused to promise not to roll on fish or not to eat cat poo.

    But thanks anyway, you are a most helpful dog!

  15. Hi, Rusty…

    Not sure I can stick with all of them…I’ll try…

    Abby xxxooo

  16. But Rusty, those are our favorite things! Especially Scampi with the doorbell on t.v., he is sooo dumb!
    -Kira the beaWootiful

  17. Haha – we especially like the one about not eating red crayons.

    Pug love from
    Pearl & Daisy

  18. Rusty,
    you are a very funny dog and I doubt that you will stop playing with Dad’s underwear when he’s on the toilet.
    I pledge to not steal G-Mom’s underwear when she goes in the shower.
    Why do we like underwear so much?

  19. I don’t follow the first two!!!

  20. The computer’s mouse is, unlike a real mouse, inedible. (Dixie must learn this!!!) See my yesterdays post.

    I will not throw up in the car.(Dixie must learn this too)

    I will not play tug o’ war with Dad’s underwear when he’s on the toilet. (Dixie must learn this too)

  21. BOL, BOL! That is funny Rusty! What a wish list, eh?

    Benson and Gibson

  22. Wow Rusty, thats alot of stuff. i am not sure I could be as disaplined as you!

  23. BOL! I can identify with Underwear and dancing about with it …

    Licks and Wags,

    TUffy of Dog WOods

  24. Rusty, what’s left in life to do? How are you gonna have fun? One time Tinky ran out the door (it was open) with my bra in her mouth. Not so bad you say? The gardeners were back there laying down a sprinkler system. Was too embarrassed to retrieve it, so it stayed out there until they left.

  25. Hi Rusty,

    WE havent heard from you in awhile and hope everything is okay! We look forward to reading more posts sometime soon, come on over and visit us too!!

    Benson and Gibson

  26. Hope everyone is ok … It’s been a while!


  27. Hello????????

    Did the skhwirrels get woo?

    Khyra O’Husky

  28. Rusty,

    Where are you? Did them nasty critters with the bushy tails tie you to a tree. I miss your cute lottle self.

    Love Mona

  29. Hey Dear Rustyyyyyy….
    where are you???
    we’re very very worried for you!!!!
    Please…back soon and give us news from you asap!!!!!
    we miss you a lot……we need youuuuuuuuuuu!!!!
    kisses and licks

  30. Hi Rusty!
    I thought I would stop by to let you know that if you are lookin’ fur love you should stop by my blog as my brother Scooby has started a new “business”. Come by and check it out.
    Big licks to you

  31. Howdy friends!

    Just wanted to check to see how you guys are doing?

    Have you been enjoying the great weather we have been having?

    Lots of Luv & Kisses
    Addie and Lucie

  32. Hi Rusty! Long time no blog. Hope to hear from you soon!! (and PS, we mentioned you on our blog today)

    ❤ S and D

  33. RUSTMEISTER!!!!!
    Where are you????

  34. Funny, funny stuff … Thanks, I needed that!!!

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