The Wednesday Howl (Martha Stewart)

The Wednesday Howl

Ten top ways to tell if Martha Stewart is stalking your dog

10. There’s potpourri hanging from his/her collar.

9. The dog’s nails have been cut with pinking shears.

8. The dog toys are all stored in McCoy crocks.

7. The pooper scooper has been decorated with raffia bows.

6. That telltale lemon slice in the new silver water bowl.

5. You find liver and whole wheat dog treats stamped out with copper cookie cutters and decorated with royal icing using a #2 rosette tip.

4. Dog hair has been collected and put into wire baskets for nesting material for the birds.

3. A seasonally appropriate grapevine wreath adorns the front of your dog’s crate.

2. Your dog goes outside naked and comes in wearing a thyme colored virgin wool hand-knitted sweater with matching boots.

AND THE NUMBER ONE WAY YOU KNOW THAT MARTHA STEWART IS STALKING YOUR DOG IS…

1. The dog droppings in your backyard have been sculpted into swans.

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10 Responses

  1. Hahahaharrooo Rusty,

    This was a funny post. Your girl Gucci was gigglin’ for sure!

    I’d loooove to join your squirrel patrol!! I hate those stupid things. >:[

    xxxoo.
    gucci.

  2. ha ha ha This is very funny cause mommy just bought one of her magazines for “fall crafts and recipes” I was scared when I saw it.

    I hope Martha doesn’t track our house because of it. As a kitty, I would NOT like potpourri on my collar. Swans in the litterbox would be fun tho…

    Thank you for welcoming me to the Squirrel Chaser Club. I call the biggest one in my yard Big Red Fatty Jerkface. Mommy calls him something else when he empties the feeders…

  3. Hilarious Rusty and so true!! 😀

  4. Woof Rusty

    That is too funny. We’d better check our yard for swans.
    Hope your doing ok and thanks again for the certificates. They’re pawsome.

    Desert Pups

  5. Who wants someone messing with who we are? When things get too neat or fancy at my house, I make sure to remind my human how things are supposed to be.

    Sophy

  6. There are no swans in our back yard, so….nope….Marthat Steward is not here. Does this human actually shape doggie doo into swans? I’d like to see that.

  7. We are still laughing at this one – too too funny!!! MS is not allowed on our property – in any shape or form, magazine included.

    Woos, the OP Pack

  8. LOL! Hilarious!

  9. Rusty every time I see that picture of you I CRACK UP LAUGHING. It might be the cutest dog picture I have EVER SEEN, and Ive seen a LOT of dog pictures. You are too cute for words.

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